John and I in Clouds

John and Michelle

I have been discussing how to take responsibility for your own actions but not that of others, living your truth, being honest with yourself and others, etc. Today I would like to talk about being respectful towards the feelings of others, which is the definition of true love.

We need to understand that we do not all feel the same about things. We need to be able to accept that someone else does not feel the same as we do on certain topics or in certain situations. Since we have all lived different lives and experienced different scenarios, we will naturally have different feelings and attitudes towards things.

We must get to a point where we can accept this. We need to be confident enough with ourselves and our feelings that any difference in opinion or feelings from someone else does not upset us. When we get to this point we begin to better be able to understand the true meaning of love.

Love is not a fleeting emotion. It does not come and go. It is unconditional. When we put conditions on loving someone, it is not truly love. When we only love someone because they are doing or acting as we want, that is not love. It is manipulation. We must understand that we need to be able to have a very open mind and heart to truly love.

When we can still love someone, even after they have hurt us deeply, that is true love. That is unconditional love. We must be able to love even if we cannot have what we want from that person. The problem is that people think love is total happiness all the time. They think love is always getting what they want from someone.

When we love someone, we are there no matter the circumstance. We are there no matter what past hurts have been done to us; however, if the relationship is consistently abusive we must leave. We need to understand that we do not need to be in a relationship with a person to love them. The truth about love is that it is an energy; therefore, it is boundless and knows no limits. Wherever we are and whether or not we are in a relationship with someone, they are receiving our loving energy.

We must understand that we do not need to remain in a relationship with someone we love if it is not healthy for us. Even if you are married to someone, if it is not healthy and even if you love the person you must do what is best for you. Leaving a relationship does not mean you should cause undue, unnecessary harm to the other person. Breaking up a relationship is painful enough and there is no need to add to it. Adding to the pain is unloving.

This is not limited to marriage or a romantic relationship. This includes all relationships, even relatives. Even if a parent/child relationship is unhealthy, it should be severed. This does not mean that they do not each other. It only means they are not good together.

We must understand that we can be angry with someone and still love them, still be there for them. When we are in a situation such as this, we need to be open and honest with the other person. We must have the courage to tell them they hurt us even if that person is not big enough to accept responsibility for their actions.

When we are capable of doing this, we will begin to experience true love and true freedom. – John